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Forums > All about Katharine > Katharine Chat
Subject: "A Wild Thing"
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Username: Gregoriancant
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08/16/2006 11:46 AM Alert 
My own take on what Don means here is applying the idea that Kat doesn't do public displays of self-pity. That's a completely different thing from private pity for yourself (and others)--that could be labled plain old depression or frustration. We've all certainly known people who openly whine and complain about situations they're in that can only be solved by their own actions. And I'm sure we've all been annoyed by the same people --even though I admit to being that way at times. I'm sure most of you have done the same thing.

We don't have to give a literal meaning to D.H. Lawrence's poem here. The magic of poetry is your own frame of reference--even if the poet had something else in mind when he or she wrote it. In this case, a bird's nest can be considered to be a public display. Dropping their young from the nest can also be a public display. I think we've all seen evidence of that in our own backyards, despite birds usually trying to find a nesting place that's away from human viewing. I've even stopped and watched it with shock and awe that a mother bird can kill their young. We've all seen it happen with other nature too such as mallards and their younglings--along with other wildlife.

The meaning in my mind is that Kat gave a public display of not weeping about her personal hardships while on 'AI.' She wasn't thinking of herself--and she never really seems to from all witnesses who've encountered her pre, during and post-'AI.'

The only difference here is that nature is nature in all instances--and human beings obviously do a lot more behind closed doors than what they do outside the doors. As the old saying we always use here goes: "Perception is reality." What people saw of Kat showed an outward reality of selflessness and holding her ground under trying circumstances. What happened on the inside away from the cameras can only be speculation--even there's evidence in her interviews that she called Peisha frequently and wept at the pressure. Any normal human being would do the same.


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08/16/2006 12:36 PM Alert 
out of all the thing i've read on this site,what you wrote was the most truthful thing ever written about our kat.truly amazing.i can't wait to read what you write next.so were all in agreement that kat is A WILD THING right,well in that case let me just say that,that wild thing definately makes my heart sing.
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08/16/2006 1:50 PM Alert 
I didnt know we had so many shrinks on this site he he
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08/16/2006 2:44 PM Alert 
applause to Don for another good post
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08/16/2006 5:50 PM Alert 
Posted By Gregoriancant on 08/16/2006 11:46 AM
My own take on what Don means here is applying the idea that Kat doesn't do public displays of self-pity. That's a completely different thing from private pity for yourself (and others)--that could be labled plain old depression or frustration. We've all certainly known people who openly whine and complain about situations they're in that can only be solved by their own actions. And I'm sure we've all been annoyed by the same people --even though I admit to being that way at times. I'm sure most of you have done the same thing.

We don't have to give a literal meaning to D.H. Lawrence's poem here. The magic of poetry is your own frame of reference--even if the poet had something else in mind when he or she wrote it. In this case, a bird's nest can be considered to be a public display. Dropping their young from the nest can also be a public display. I think we've all seen evidence of that in our own backyards, despite birds usually trying to find a nesting place that's away from human viewing. I've even stopped and watched it with shock and awe that a mother bird can kill their young. We've all seen it happen with other nature too such as mallards and their younglings--along with other wildlife.

The meaning in my mind is that Kat gave a public display of not weeping about her personal hardships while on 'AI.' She wasn't thinking of herself--and she never really seems to from all witnesses who've encountered her pre, during and post-'AI.'

The only difference here is that nature is nature in all instances--and human beings obviously do a lot more behind closed doors than what they do outside the doors. As the old saying we always use here goes: "Perception is reality." What people saw of Kat showed an outward reality of selflessness and holding her ground under trying circumstances. What happened on the inside away from the cameras can only be speculation--even there's evidence in her interviews that she called Peisha frequently and wept at the pressure. Any normal human being would do the same.



Hi Greg!

Thanks for your thoughtful (as usual) reply. I think we'll agree to disagree about whether Lawrence's poem is the best tool for describing Kat, but I have to say I'm quite curious about your reading of the poem itself: What got you thinking that there is a mother bird here killing her young?! I know the bird is said to be "small," but I thought his point is that even a little, unprotected bird will silently tough it out through the bitter weather until it drops frozen from the cold down to the hard ground below. No public display--even of an infanticidal character (ugh)--just birdy stoicism unto a lonely death, I believe.

Gary
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08/16/2006 6:29 PM Alert 

Well, this topic has certainly generated a good discussion of the meaning of Lawrence's poem and the definition of self pity.

Just to add to the discussion, I personally feel that there is never really a place for self pity. Emotions, yes; but self pity is not an emotion, it's a behavior. Self pity comes after the fact of something negative happening in one's life, and seems to me a false justification for one's inability to actively deal with the situation at hand. Self pity never leads to a resolution, and therein lies the danger.

I certainly go through a wide range of emotions over negatives - frustration, anger, and sadness being a few. To use examples I mentioned in another post, I shed tears, pound the floor, and even bang my head on the wall sometimes. But rather than pitying myself that something negative happened to me, and giving in to it, my priority becomes turning that negative into a positive (or at least a neutral), and moving on. I can't change what happened, but I can control how the situation ultimately resolves itself within myself.

Lawrence's poem inspired me long ago in developing my own attitude toward self pity. I may well have missed the meaning as Lawrence intended it. I do know, however, that it has served me well as I originally felt it, and will continue to do so.
Katharine's summer is full of hope, full of potential, and promises to provide many bouquets to grace the home that I call my heart.

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Username: KatKrazy
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08/16/2006 9:09 PM Alert 
Posted By KatFan49 on 08/16/2006 6:29 PM

Well, this topic has certainly generated a good discussion of the meaning of Lawrence's poem and the definition of self pity.

Just to add to the discussion, I personally feel that there is never really a place for self pity. Emotions, yes; but self pity is not an emotion, it's a behavior. Self pity comes after the fact of something negative happening in one's life, and seems to me a false justification for one's inability to actively deal with the situation at hand. Self pity never leads to a resolution, and therein lies the danger.

I certainly go through a wide range of emotions over negatives - frustration, anger, and sadness being a few. To use examples I mentioned in another post, I shed tears, pound the floor, and even bang my head on the wall sometimes. But rather than pitying myself that something negative happened to me, and giving in to it, my priority becomes turning that negative into a positive (or at least a neutral), and moving on. I can't change what happened, but I can control how the situation ultimately resolves itself within myself.

Lawrence's poem inspired me long ago in developing my own attitude toward self pity. I may well have missed the meaning as Lawrence intended it. I do know, however, that it has served me well as I originally felt it, and will continue to do so.


Dear Don,

I appreciate your post. It clears up a lot of things for me. I had a sense that you were "down" on self-pity, but now I see that for you self-pity = a decision to stay stuck and to not move forward. That's not what it means to me at all. To me there is very little difference between feeling sadness, anger or self-pity in terms of dealing with hard times. I see self-pity as another feeling that we have and need to acknowledge in order to be able to move on. And self-pity has elements of compassion toward oneself; I think self-loathing is a much bigger obstacle.  

I'm glad Lawrence's poem has been empowering for you. I can see how you took it: keeping your focus on the aims you believe in and not letting certain feelings, as important as they are, deflect you from the good course.  

Gary
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08/21/2006 4:05 PM Alert 
I just wanted to bump up this post because it's something we should all keep in mind! Sometimes, we run low on Kat news, and it's nice to read something as beautiful as this...

We, myself included, get wrapped up in many thing such as KAT IN GLASSES and other things, but it's always good to come back to the main reason that we adore this beautiful girl...

So, if you haven't read this yet, read it, and if you have READ IT AGAIN!!! It's beautiful and describes Kat to a tee!
KAT IN GLASSES!!!

*August 16, 2006 1:50 am...Mutt and I in the chat screaming our butts off...good times!!

Met Kat at the Kimmel show, February 7, 2007!
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