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After trying about a million combinations on the ingredients I have available, there she was, in all her southern-belle glory, the naughty little minx herself, Kellie “Calamari” Pickler. At first, she was a bit apprehensive in doing the interview, mumbling stuff I barely understood, saying things about Katharine and the other Idols, but as we went along, she became very comfortable with me and started to enjoy our little tete-a-tete.
I noticed a little fly or two buzzing about the room during the interview but I shrugged it off, thinking that these might be my colleagues from The Daily Dung out to check how I'm doing. (Greg, please confirm) Anyhow, I first asked Kellie how she's doing, and she told me she's having the buzz of her life on the tour, singing for multitudes of people, sneaking around with Katharine to go dump their used bottles of water on Taylor's and Ace's bed (noting that this was her and Kat's most favorite activity during the tour). I tried orbing to the guys' tour bus to check it out, and true enough, Taylor and Ace both are sleeping on hundreds of mineral water bottles (Tay even has one bottle stuck on his mouth, like a baby bottle)After that, I noticed Kellie started to doze off (she was exhausted like the fan, “exhaust fan”, get it?), I barraged with her with questions on her upcoming album. She told me it definitely is gonna sound like country, with songs themed along the lines of heartbreak, hooking up, and surely, family. Fans should expect the same old twangy voice they heard on Idol along with new tweaks on her singing. For instance, Kellie's gonna try doing an R'n'B/dance version of Walkin' After Midnight which she will push to be released as the album's first single. Title? Kellie says she's got no idea whatsoever on that particular aspect (“naming the album?! I thought it automatically comes up when all the songs are finished!” Kellie says) and leaves it up to the people who wears the dark jackets during the recording sessions. (“I think they have all the answers”, she quips)I tried asking her some more questions about the album, but she was already sleeping soundly after her last answer. With that, I decided to bring her back to the Idol bus (wherever in world that was) before she wakes up the whole neighborhood (my whole family was already banging on my door at the time) with her snoring/guzzling sounds.
You thought the article was gonna end here huh? Um, actually it is ending here. Gotta go clean up my room and fix the door. Kellie was a bit of a mess when she left, she was spitting gum left and right while mumbling “Will Ferrell wiped my armpits! Oh my gah!” Bye!
*follows Yuv on the way with the yellow poking McPheenger*
What the..?!?! Somebody catch that loony!!! He's trying to botch MY interview!!!
Give him a job at THT or TDD, please, whatever, do something, just don't let him mess up my career!!
If he does that again, I swear, I'm gonna have to orb him somewhere very, very far from here...
Katharine McPhee fans around the world