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Forums > Katharine Activities > Katharine 'Projects'
Subject: McPoetry Project Poem Thread
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Author Messages
Username: flamingojess
Online: User is Offline
Posts:98

Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location: Oklahoma


Member Since 4/6/2006
07/07/2006 11:40 AM Alert 
Ya'll are all like pro poetry writers here.  I would love to contribute, but I'm only 15, and I'm not that great of a poetry writer, even though I love to write and read it.  I've written poems, but I don't see any as good as the ones already posted here.

I'm going to try to write a poem for Kat, and see what I can come up with.  It will probably take a while though! But I'm gonna try my hardest!
Username: Jimmy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:63
Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location:


Member Since 5/19/2006
07/07/2006 12:24 PM Alert 
Go for it, Flamingojess! I'm sure you much better than you think you are.
Username: KatKrazy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:258
Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location: Chicago


Member Since 5/17/2006
07/07/2006 6:27 PM Alert 
Yes, yes, what Jimmy said, Jess.
We'd love you to write. I won't press,
but your poem can't be more a big mess
than all us hacks who try, I'd guess.

Looking forward to your work!

Gary
Username: flamingojess
Online: User is Offline
Posts:98

Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location: Oklahoma


Member Since 4/6/2006
07/07/2006 9:19 PM Alert 
aw! you guys are so nice! I just love you all!

Okay...I tryed to write a poem...but its not too good...so time for ya'll to help me edit it and everything or tell me if I need to add something/take something away! Thanks! Here is is:

My Inspiration

You are everything I need
To make it through the day.
An inspiration to live my life,
And do some good each day.

All that you have overcome,
and all that you are and have been,
Has shown that I can make it through
The storms of life that come along.

Though I've had to face some painful times,
I just listen to your voice or think back to things you've said,
And I know that I will make it through,
and outshine the pains in life, just like you have.


-Jessica, 15
Duncan, Oklahoma

see, it needs a lot of work.  any advice/help anyone?
Username: Jimmy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:63
Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location:


Member Since 5/19/2006
07/08/2006 1:09 PM Alert 
Its actually pretty good because my first impression is - its honest. And it flows. So I really do see beauty in its simplicity and honesty. I hate to edit other people's work especially poetry because it is so personal and sometimes all you have to do is change a word or a phrase and the raw feeling is lost in translation. Great job, Jess.
Username: Avoidant
Online: User is Offline
Posts:4

Katharine Acquaintance
Katharine Acquaintance
Location: CA


Member Since 7/7/2006
07/08/2006 3:32 PM Alert 

Everyone writes very well...here's my attempt. I didn't spend too long on it, it could be better. 

The Powers That You Bear
(by Ria A.)

You're beautiful, talented and generous
You made rainbows and love ubiquitous
You are probably unaware
 of the powers that you bear.
 
You were an unexpected delight
in my once desolate life.
You filled my world with harmony
my senses dance as you sing.
 
You make people stop.
and listen and hold their breaths.
Everything you do
makes me love you to death.

Your happiness is mine
Your pain cuts me as well.
You are like a fine wine
And I am under your spell.
 
I often wonder if there's anything that you cannot do
Then I say of course there's not
If Kat can dream it, it will come true.
Username: willow
Online: User is Offline
Posts:183

Katharine Obsessed
Katharine Obsessed
Location: Philippines


Member Since 5/11/2006
07/08/2006 9:37 PM Alert 
Here's mine. I've tried and I hope this is good enough.

I have seen you smile
I have seen you cry
I have seen how you fight it out
To get to where you are
Your journey has began
The moment you stand on line
Hearing your beautiful voice
I knew you’d be fine.
You made it through and through
And you landed at number two
You may not have made it
But the dream doesn’t end there yet.
It’s not so bad that you lost it
Cause you have gained the world instead
Doesn’t matter being not the American Idol
When people sees you as the World Idol.
This is your journey
This is what you’re gonna be
Got the world smitten by your charm
I guess, that’s your destiny.

-kim
Username: flamingojess
Online: User is Offline
Posts:98

Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location: Oklahoma


Member Since 4/6/2006
07/08/2006 11:24 PM Alert 
Posted By Jimmy on 07/08/2006 1:09 PM
Its actually pretty good because my first impression is - its honest. And it flows. So I really do see beauty in its simplicity and honesty. I hate to edit other people's work especially poetry because it is so personal and sometimes all you have to do is change a word or a phrase and the raw feeling is lost in translation. Great job, Jess.


thanks...i added a word..don't know if it made any difference though
Username: Jimmy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:63
Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location:


Member Since 5/19/2006
07/09/2006 11:11 AM Alert 
Hi Bill,

Here's mine - a revised version of something I'd posted a month or so ago. Thanks for doing this!


For Katharine

Each morning,
when dawn is
but a slimmer of light beneath the curtains,
the trees come to life.
A chorus of perfect pitches, scales,
filling my soul with melancholy.

And so my heart aches for you.
This void, this hollowness,
follows me, like a shadow,
through dreams and realities.
Alas, no wine I know
can quite melt this darkness.

Abruptly, I hear only silence.
Echoes of emptiness
ring joyfully through my ears.
And thus I see,
the true nature of impermanence,
and how precious each moment is.

With this,
my heart again knows happiness.
For all I truly need
is just your smile.
And who would have thought it,
without fame, money or wine.

by

Jimmy
Duluth, GA
Username: KatKrazy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:258
Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location: Chicago


Member Since 5/17/2006
07/09/2006 1:33 PM Alert 
Jess, Ria and Willow,

I had written some responses to your lovely poems, but it got lost in a computer glitch. I'll reconstruct my post later, but for now, thanks so much for your work!

Jimmy, I think I recall your first draft and this seems like a very strong upgrade. My only suggestion (and I know they are not easy to take, like when my friend, the real poet, "gently" indicates what could be better in my stuff) is that you have quite a few abstract nouns like "melancholy", "emptiness", "impermanence", etc. Perhaps concretizing these just a bit could add something. You have many beautiful images, in my opinion. I especially like "chorus of perfect pitches" and the last line is a great ending--using solid and familiar things to make a great point about Kat's music.

Now, Willow--
I started to play with some minor changes to your poem that you might consider (which I'll say more about later), but it evolved into a separate work. You get credit for inspiring this (although you may not want credit!) and you will see the connections with yours.

Looking for feedback on this from you all, if you have time.

Gary




The Contest

 

I saw you smile on stage.
But you have cried,
fought fear down inside, swallowed hard

truths and sandwiches

to be where you stand.
Your song and the weight of the world began

long before show time,

before waiting and singing in your last long line.
I heard voices and knew yours was finer,

but knew nothing of hungry choices  

made a thousand times and once,

to be.

 

In an unfair contest you came out

in first place.
You looked humble and fair,

not claiming top prizes,
just the same fantastic dream

to live well, do what you can do.

From you I learned about idols,
how it’s not bad losing

or gaining, or having

or losing fame

if you save your world.

She who would save her life

must gain song. And me?

I’m hungry to choose.  












**************  

 
Username: NothlitHawk777
Online: User is Offline
Posts:1817

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location:


Member Since 5/31/2006
07/09/2006 4:50 PM Alert 
Wow, Gary, I love that last one! It's fantastic
"I think it was the summertime when I laid eyes on you. I didn't even know your name...The boy you never wanted just steals your heart..."--Kat McPhee, Love Story

"4 walls and no you. The silence in this room is so loud...wow"--Kat McPhee, I Lost You

"I didn't see the crash that burnt the bridge, didn't see the missile that sank my loveship down..."--Kat McPhee, Dangerous

"Wanting you to be wanting me, no that ain't no way to be...You never were a friend of mine..."--Kat McPhee, Over It

"No more lonely nights to hurt me, no more tears left to spare, no more reasons to be unhappy. You threw them all up in the air..."--Kat McPhee, Each Other

"Your pedicure, white-tipped French. Your legs don't make no sense...Shoes like these make me hate flats..."--Kat McPhee, Open Toes
Username: willow
Online: User is Offline
Posts:183

Katharine Obsessed
Katharine Obsessed
Location: Philippines


Member Since 5/11/2006
07/09/2006 8:29 PM Alert 
Hey Gary.

It's fine with me. And is that the poem? It's great.
I had two more, though the words all plain and simple but I'd really love for you to take a look at it and comment. It's nice to know that someone's interested enough to comment. That way it'll inspire me to improve my work. I'll post soon.
Good vibes.

-kim
Username: Trina
Online: User is Offline
Posts:507

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location:


Member Since 5/25/2006
07/09/2006 11:23 PM Alert 
Gary,

Like fine wine you just get better and better. How deeply and emotionally stirring and heartfelt. Well done!
Username: KatFan49
Online: User is Offline
Posts:624

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location: Just outside the Capitol of the Free World


Member Since 7/8/2006
07/09/2006 11:52 PM Alert 
Note for Trina -

Thank you so much for your kind words in the chat forum regarding my essay "Hope".  I would be honored to be included in writings about Katharine, but I really don't write poetry - just thoughts that develop into...well, they just develop.  I love the play of words and the joy of stringing them together to express an emotion or a deeply felt idea.

I'm an artist and fine art consultant by profession, and writing to me is another form of creative expression.  It's kind of funny since all through school I never really had a true interest in the language arts.  The visual arts held more attraction for me.  

Again, I would indeed be honored to be considered for inclusion in this wonderful project.  Please feel free to run "Hope" by the other members active in the project and see if they would be willing to include an essay or two (or three).

I'll check here to see how it turns out, or you can feel free to e-mail me.

Again, thank you so much.   
Katharine's summer is full of hope, full of potential, and promises to provide many bouquets to grace the home that I call my heart.

www.myspace.com/katfan49
www.myspace.com/katfia
www.myspace.com/katspack
Username: NothlitHawk777
Online: User is Offline
Posts:1817

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location:


Member Since 5/31/2006
07/10/2006 6:40 AM Alert 
Did someone say essay? Woohoo!
"I think it was the summertime when I laid eyes on you. I didn't even know your name...The boy you never wanted just steals your heart..."--Kat McPhee, Love Story

"4 walls and no you. The silence in this room is so loud...wow"--Kat McPhee, I Lost You

"I didn't see the crash that burnt the bridge, didn't see the missile that sank my loveship down..."--Kat McPhee, Dangerous

"Wanting you to be wanting me, no that ain't no way to be...You never were a friend of mine..."--Kat McPhee, Over It

"No more lonely nights to hurt me, no more tears left to spare, no more reasons to be unhappy. You threw them all up in the air..."--Kat McPhee, Each Other

"Your pedicure, white-tipped French. Your legs don't make no sense...Shoes like these make me hate flats..."--Kat McPhee, Open Toes
Username: Jimmy
Online: User is Offline
Posts:63
Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location:


Member Since 5/19/2006
07/10/2006 9:58 AM Alert 
Thanks, Gary. I appreciate your kind feedback and comments. You are right on the money with your comment on the abstract nouns - i, too was concerned that it may be too abstract! It has to do with Eastern philosophy and quite honestly, my "understanding" of it, is alas, limited to the pure "academic and analytical" type!

Your poem is great. I'm really not good at all w/ tinkering others' poems - whenever I tried to do that, I usually end up changing the writers' true meaning or raw emotion!
Username: flamingojess
Online: User is Offline
Posts:98

Katharine Crazy
Katharine Crazy
Location: Oklahoma


Member Since 4/6/2006
07/10/2006 1:46 PM Alert 
Posted By KatKrazy on 07/09/2006 1:33 PM





The Contest

 

I saw you smile on stage.
But you have cried,
fought fear down inside, swallowed hard

truths and sandwiches

to be where you stand.
Your song and the weight of the world began

long before show time,

before waiting and singing in your last long line.
I heard voices and knew yours was finer,

but knew nothing of hungry choices  

made a thousand times and once,

to be.

 

In an unfair contest you came out

in first place.
You looked humble and fair,

not claiming top prizes,
just the same fantastic dream

to live well, do what you can do.

From you I learned about idols,
how it’s not bad losing

or gaining, or having

or losing fame

if you save your world.

She who would save her life

must gain song. And me?

I’m hungry to choose.  












**************  

 


Wow I love this poem you wrote! It's beautiful!
Username: Trina
Online: User is Offline
Posts:507

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location:


Member Since 5/25/2006
07/10/2006 2:23 PM Alert 
Note for KatFan49,

A few weeks back I was asked to do the cover for Katharine's poetry book. I have an art degree in fine art and felt honored by the request. I am working on different ideas to be used for the cover, etc. When I read your background as an artist and fine art consultant my eyes lit up. With your experience in art, maybe we could correspond, and you could let me know what you think of the drawings. You also have a talent in writing and should definitely submit a poem for the book. My email address is tejames84@yahoo.com. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Trina
Username: groucho
Online: User is Offline
Posts:4081

Katharine Addict
Katharine Addict
Location: Detroit area


Member Since 4/4/2006
07/10/2006 5:09 PM Alert 
Question for Jimmy. (I'm still chewing over this stuff...sorry if I sound critical but this is just stuff that stuck in my mind.) Slimmer: combo of "sliver" and "glimmer"? A slimmer of light? Is this an intentional new word? Also, does wine melt stuff? I was looking for another verb. Maybe wine makes things more bearable. What's a single word for that? Dispel the darkness?

KatKrazy. I'm puzzling over the "unfair contest" line... also the last line has overtones of "to be or not to be" and I'm certainly puzzling over that. Also still chewing on all the food metaphors. For some reason the line about chewi