OK, just a quick overview here to explain what's going on before you head in.  First, the narrator of this story is named John.  You may remember him from Groucho's "Kat Who Came Home" where he was a member of the Glowstick Brigade who "saved" Chris' son Ajay at Staples Center.  He also had a moment where Katharine sang to him after the show. 

He then appeared in "It's All Coming Back To Me" as Katharine's personal assistant.  He was shopping with Katharine for Adriana's wedding gift and then Katharine went into contractions with her first child, Kaycee.  John drove Katharine home and waiting with her for Chris to arrive so they could go to the hospital.

He then was also mentioned in "Old McDonald Had A Christmas" in the part about Kaycee's collection of odd stuffed animals given to her by John.

So there's your re-introduction to your narrator of this story if you needed one.  Or an introduction if you haven't read the stories mentioned.

This story takes place a little after Rainbowland I.  Katharine is 29 years old (I believe), Kaycee is about 3, Pookie is almost 1.  So I guess this is Christmas in 2013.

Without further adieu, here's Christmas In Rainbowland.  Just a little warning.  You might want to copy and paste this thing into a Word document.  And print it out.  It's longer than normal so...just warning you ahead of time.

            “Hurry up, Katharine, we’ve got to be at the airport in 30 minutes!” I said.

            “I’ll be there in a minute, John.  You’ve got everything ready to go, right?” she said.

            Of course I had everything ready to go.  I had been waiting for this day for the past six weeks.  Katharine’s run on Broadway playing Velma Kelly in Chicago was over and we were heading back home just in time for Christmas.

            The three months in New York were difficult for both of us.  We both knew it would be the day we left Los Angeles in early September.  Katharine got homesick as soon as the plane took off from LAX.

            “I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to do this for three months,” she said.  “I don’t know if I can handle being away from the kids that long.  Broadway has just always been a dream of mine.  I couldn’t turn it down.  You know?”

            I nodded.  I thought it was funny that she only mentioned missing the kids and not Chris.  I knew she didn’t mean anything by it.  She’s told me that having me with her helps keep her from missing Chris.  Not that I can do everything for her that he does but I suppose I’m a good substitute.  I had grown accustomed to accompanying her on trips all over the place.  It was a part of my job as her do-it-all assistant.  I didn’t really have a job description other than “keeping my Princess happy” as Chris told me once.

            I took Chris’ words to heart.  Ever since the unbelievable day I got the phone call from Katharine asking me if I wanted to work for her almost all of my energy was devoted to making Katharine’s life easier.  It wasn’t all about packing her clothes, taking phone messages or making sure she was where she was supposed to be.  The most important task I had was keeping her happy.  And usually that meant listening.  Lots of listening to her.  Being the one there for her to talk to when she was away from home.  Sure, she called Chris every night and sometimes she’d tell me to go get something at the store when she was on the phone with Chris.  I knew that meant the conversation was going to places I couldn’t go with her.

            This trip was going to be hard on me as well.  I was leaving my girlfriend Anna behind.  Katharine assured me that she’d pay for airplane tickets for Anna to come to New York while we were there.  “As many times as you need her here” were the words Katharine said when I asked if there were limits to her airplane ticket buying for my girl.

            That helped ease the homesickness I was feeling, knowing that Anna would be able to come to New York whenever it was possible for her to do so.  She is a writer like I am, she covers politics for the Los Angeles Times.  I met her at the paper when I was the beat writer for the Los Angeles Kings.

            I left the paper to work for Katharine.  Anna thought I was crazy to leave a job I’d always dreamed about to be Katharine’s assistant.  But she knew how I felt about Katharine.  How could she not?  I would get in trouble sometimes because I’d have days when I would get into “Katharine mode” as Anna used to call it.  When I’d start saying, “Did you hear that Katharine’s going to be doing this?  Did you see her in US Weekly?  Can you believe what they are saying about her now?”

            Fortunately for me, she understood that I was just an obsessed fan.  I made sure to let her know that as obsessed as I was with Katharine, I was more than that for her.

            “So John, you ever think about asking Anna to marry you?” Katharine asked as the pilot mentioned we were flying over Kansas.

            I thought it was strange that he felt the need to mention we were over Kansas.  Maybe he knew the girl that made the phrase “We’re not in Kansas anymore” famous again was on board.

            “John...JOHN, did you hear me?” she said.

            “What?  I heard you say something about getting married.  Who’s getting married?”

            “You, silly!  I asked if you’d ever thought about asking Anna to marry you.  I mean you’ve been together since before Kaycee was born.  It’s been what?  Four years now?”

            “Five, actually.  I’ve been working for you for almost four years.”

            “Oh, well what are you waiting for?  I know how much you love her.  I remember you babbling one night about how the only woman you’ve ever really loved was her.  Well, I think you said you loved me but I know that’s different.  A different kind of love.  I love you too, John.  You know that.”

            “I know you do.  Just don’t say that around Chris, he’ll get jealous.”

            “Stop it!  If he doesn’t know by now that he’s the only one for me, he’ll never know.”

            “You know how he is.  I’m not that different.  You know how I get about Anna sometimes.  I know I have nothing to worry about just like Chris doesn’t need to worry about you but…we only do it because we don’t want to lose you.”

            “Well, isn’t that all the more reason to ask her to marry you?”

            I knew she was right.  It was time.  I just had to figure out the place.  And being in New York for three months was going to make it tricky.

            “Katharine?  I’m not going to ask her until we get back to Los Angeles but will you help me pick out a ring for Anna?  You’ve got the best taste in jewelry on Earth so I figure I can’t mess it up if I have you with me.”

            “Yeah, and maybe I’ll pay for it!  You know I’m not picking out anything cheap for Anna.”

            “No, no, no.  You can just give me a raise so I can pay for it myself!”

            We laughed so hard about that.  Before we knew it we were touching down at LaGuardia Airport in New York.  Our three months away from home were officially beginning.

            Life in New York was definitely different for both of us.  It’s amazing how being away from home throws everything off balance.  Katharine and I had to develop new routines to keep her feeling stable, comfortable and in the general right state of mind to perform in Chicago night after night.  We managed.  We discovered the best coffee shop two blocks away from the apartment that had become our temporary home.  I think settling into that place calmed her down.  At least as well as she could be calmed 3,000 miles away from her husband and children.

            The apartment in New York was big enough for the two of us to have our own privacy.  Big enough for the visits from Chris, Kaycee and Pookie.  Big enough for Anna and I when she visited.  It was about as perfect as an unperfect situation could be.

            Speaking of perfect, Katharine’s performances on Broadway were the picture of perfection.

            What I knew of Chicago was what I had seen in the movie with Catherine Zeta-Jones and Renee Zellweger.  I had always loved the part in the movie where Catherine Zeta-Jones sings All That Jazz until I saw Katharine do it.  She earned raves from all the Broadway critics and her sultry version of All That Jazz was what all of them highlighted in their reviews.  I definitely couldn’t argue with them.  After awhile the show started to get boring for me and I didn’t go every night.  But I had to see Katharine sing All That Jazz at least a few times a week.

            She knew it, too.  She teased me about it.  She came back to the apartment one night that I didn’t go to the show and knocked on the door to my room.

            “Johnny, can I come in?” she said.

            “Um, sure.  Of course you can, Katharine.”

            “Are you alone?”

            “Yeah, why?”

“Just wanted to make sure you didn’t have any company because I have something just for you.”

“OK, come on in.  I’m ready.”

As she opened the door, my mouth dropped.  She was in her All That Jazz costume.

“Uh, Katharine?  What are you doing wearing that?”

“Shh…just enjoy the show, John.”

She performed the sexiest version of that song I’d ever seen.  That she could do this a cappella was a testament to her extraordinary talent.

“Did you like that?” she asked with a devilish smile.

“Do you think Chris would approve of you doing this?  I mean, he trusts me to look after you and all when he can’t.  You think he’d like to know that you are doing this in my bedroom for me?”

“Sure, let’s call him and tell him!”

She grabbed her cell phone and dialed Chris’ number up.  I could hear her side of the conversation for a few minutes and then she startled me.

“Oh Christopher, guess what I just did for John?  Here I’ll let him tell you.”  She handed the phone over to me.  I didn’t know what to do with it.  Katharine waved her hands at me disgustedly.  “Go on, tell him!” she implored.

“Hey John, so what is my crazy wife doing for you?”

“Well, you know that All That Jazz number in Chicago, right?”

“Of course, I love that song.”

“Well, I mentioned to Katharine how that’s my favorite part of the show and then tonight I had some things to take care of so I didn’t go to the show.  So she showed up back at the apartment…”

“She didn’t.  No, of course she did.  I should know her by now.  She gave you a personal show?”

“Yes, you could say that,” I said.

“Was it good?” he asked.

            “What do you think?”

            “Sorry, stupid question.  Of course it was probably great.  Did she do a really sexy version?”

            “What do you think?”

            “Oh yeah, stupid question again.”

            “Anyway, so from the sound of it you don’t mind that she’s doing sexy personal performances for me while you are so far away.”

            “That’s just how she is, John.  You should know that by now.  You know I trust you.  I know you’d never do anything to jeopardize our relationship.  Not to mention your relationship with Anna.  I know she’s just messing with you.  She’s a flirt.  She loves driving men crazy.  And you happen to be the one around her the most right now.  So you get some of the benefits I get when she’s home.”

            “Just some?” I cracked.

            “Yeah, you better be just getting some of them,” he said with a laugh.

            “Right, well you want to talk to your wife again?”

            “Sure, let me hear that lovely voice.”

            I could hear Katharine on the phone for about ten more minutes before she came walking back into my room.

            “Uh, is there more to the show?” I said.

            “Oh, I still have this stuff on?” she said looking at herself.  “Uh no, your show is over.  Chris just told me he’s bringing the kids with him and coming here next weekend.  Isn’t that exciting?  Maybe you should call Anna and see if she can hop on the plane with them?  That would be fun.”

            “Can I tell her my beautiful boss is giving me personal shows in my bedroom?  That’ll definitely get her to come.”

            “Uh, you’re on your own there, buddy.”

            I called Anna and asked if she wanted to join Chris and the kids on the plane to New York to visit me.  She said that she’d love to but she was working on a major story for the paper and wasn’t sure if it would be done by the time Chris was planning on leaving for New York.  I told her to call Chris and make arrangements one way or the other.

            “I really, really need to see you, darling,” I said.

            “I know.  I miss you, too.  I’ll do my best to get this article done earlier than I was planning.  I think I can.  I might have to stay late the next few nights but having a weekend with you is worth that.”

            “I know you can.  Just think happy thoughts of the two of us wandering around New York if you are having any problems getting the story onto the page.”

            “I do that all the time, anyway,” she said.  “OK, I should go get back to work.  Let’s see, I’ve got Chris’ number right?  Let me check.  Yeah, I do.  Alright, I’ll talk to you later, sweetie.”

            “I love you,” I said while kissing the phone.

            “Love you too,” she said while kissing her phone back.

            As I set the phone down, I noticed Katharine had been watching me the whole time.  She liked making fun of how I get when I talk to or about Anna.  She’s told me how funny she thinks it is that her usually serious, businesslike assistant turns into a hopeless romantic when it comes to his girl.  But she’s also told me she loves that about me.

            “You didn’t tell her!” Katharine yelled at me.

            “Tell her what?”

            “About the little show I gave you.”

            “Oh, I forgot.”

            “You forgot?  How could you forget?  What it wasn’t very memorable for you?  Should I do it better next time?” she said smiling at me.

            “There’s going to be a next time?  Sorry, my mind goes blank sometimes when I talk to her.”

            “Yeah, I know.  She’s got you wrapped around her finger.”

            “Which finger?” I asked.

            “You know which one,” she said.  “You wanna go shopping for her tomorrow?”

            “No, if I have a ring when she’s here, I don’t know.  I want to wait until the right time.  I want to do it at home in Los Angeles.  As romantic as doing it in New York sounds, I want to ask her somewhere that we can go back to when whenever we want.”

            “Aww, you’re so sweet, Johnny.  Fine then, you know I’m going to keep bothering you about this until we get that ring for Anna.  I’m not going to let you chicken out on this.”

            “I know.  I just want to do this right.