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Forums > American Idol > American Idol Satire and Fiction
Subject: A Note From the Editor of The Hollywood Tattletale
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Username: KatFan49
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08/01/2006 4:55 PM Alert 
 The Hollywood Tattletale
"If you subscribe to us...you need a life"

A Note From the Editor

Hollywood - Clueless Press International   The Hollywood Tattletale is dedicated to providing satire and humor about American Idol and the contestants. The young men and women who have the courage to stand in front of millions and risk it all for a chance at fame and stardom deserve our utmost respect and devotion. To accord them anything less would be wrong.

Everything reported here goes through a screening process. This is not a gossip tabloid designed to dig up and spread dirt. Two questions must be answered positively before an article is approved for publication.

First, would I be able to laugh about the article if it were written about me? Second, would the people mentioned in the article be hurt or feel attacked unfairly if they were to read it?

Granted, the above questions are answered according to my own personal guidelines of what is offensive or not. That said, I am a mature person with a good, healthy sense of humor about myself and the world around me. No article will ever be published that would intentionally disrespect anyone unless that person has themselves lied about, bashed, disrespected or offended a beloved idol. Fools are fair game. No article will ever be published that would intentionally make fun of an idol's personal difficulties, tragedies or troubles, especially those over which they have no control. Obscenities and sexual content will also not be allowed.

In this troubled world we live in, humor provides a way of keeping the mood light and reminding us that there is still plenty to laugh about. The Hollywood Tattletale is dedicated to maintaining that sense of humor while at the same time respecting dignity and fair play.

Thank you.
Katharine's summer is full of hope, full of potential, and promises to provide many bouquets to grace the home that I call my heart.

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08/01/2006 6:05 PM Alert 
Oh, you have heard from Ms. Cosby, ha ha
We are definitely working together -- working on a record together. She sings so magnificently, it's just amazing -David Foster-
Username: KatFan49
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08/01/2006 6:30 PM Alert 
Posted By Minnie on 08/01/2006 6:05 PM
Oh, you have heard from Ms. Cosby, ha ha
Yes. She said:

"Please, call off the dogs. My email in-box is overflowing and the server has shut down. I promise I'll be good. Really. Really good. I promise."

I have yet to reply. Let her sweat.
Katharine's summer is full of hope, full of potential, and promises to provide many bouquets to grace the home that I call my heart.

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08/01/2006 6:41 PM Alert 
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08/02/2006 8:58 AM Alert 
Based on what I can see of the free issues I get of The Daily Dung, they also live up to the finest standards of satiric journalism. Though their mission statement was quoted once to be: "Serious journalism with a wink of an eye and poking someone else’s eye out with a stick." They consider themselves to be serious daredevil journalists who go after deserving people who usually see the world through half an eye. And then there’s that other mission statement on another half of their daily work: "Hiding under the desk or in the closets and porta-potties of America to get the unheard truth." Sometimes that means doing daring hideouts just to get inside scoops on people like the American Idols.

Though I’ve personally never seen those above mission statements printed, the most recent issue I received gave a brief history of The Daily Dung and how it formed into what it is. It seems Ted Casablanca’s younger brother, Tim, (TDD’s founding CEO) decided to create a ‘Declaration of Principles’ that was influenced by what Charles Foster Kane does in Orson Welles’s ‘Citizen Kane.’ Reportedly, this declaration had some of the highest journalistic principles ever known in the western world. Yes, that’s right, The Daily Dung was originally going to be a newspaper with real journalistic integrity. They even had a revolutionary concept of having all the sports reporters become restaurant and entertainment critics to save money—which has been endlessly copied today in every newspaper.

Even the name of TDD was different then. As a newspaper, it was called The Daily Discombobulation to show that the world was in a state of confusion—and the reporters at the paper would try to make perfect sense of it all. It almost was changed to The Daily Doggerel at one point when a lot of the reporters started writing columns in poetic verse and haiku.

Then, of course, the CEO went insane and ended up tearing up the Declaration of Principles—much like Charles Foster Kane did in ‘Citizen Kane.’ That’s when all the talented reporters quit en masse, and ones who had worked mostly at rags were hired to replace them. No one’s quite sure why the CEO renamed it The Daily Dung—but rumors abound that the title came to mind when the CEO’s nurse gave him a laxative after an especially bad day of insanity.

This same issue I’m talking about also printed pieces of that Declaration of Principles that were thought lost.  But torn fragments were found in an abandoned shredder at the head offices in NYC. The four random fragments were thus:

"...sports reporters lay on the snark at all concerts..."

 "...sorbet is yummy..."

 "...Washington Post up the wazoo..."

 "...truth is preferable to error..."

Perhaps those fragments still send some kind of message, though I sort of have a hunch that TDD still loosely upholds to the complete set of principles. I’ll let you decide that for yourself...
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Forums > American Idol > American Idol Satire and Fiction > A Note From the Editor of The Hollywood Tattletale


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